WIN-WIN APPROACH
|
WIN-LOSE APPROACH
|
| Define the conflict as a mutual problem. |
Define the conflict as a win-lose situation. |
| Pursue goals held in common. |
Pursue one’s own goals. |
| Find creative agreements that are satisfying to both
parties or present a mutually acceptable compromise. |
Force the other party into submission. |
| Have an accurate personal understanding of one’s
own needs and show them correctly. |
Have an accurate personal understanding of one’s
own needs, but publicly disguise or misrepresent them. |
| Try to equalize power by emphasizing mutual
interdependence, avoiding harm, inconvenience, harassment, embarrassment to the other
party. |
Try to increase one’s power over the other party by
emphasizing one’s independence from the other and the other’s dependence upon
oneself. |
| Make sure contacts are on the equal power. |
Try to arrange contact where one’s own basis of
power is the greater. |
| Use open, honest, and accurate communication of
one’s needs, goals, position, and proposals. |
Use deceitful, inaccurate, and misleading communication
of one’s needs, goals, position, and proposals. |
| Work to have highest empathy and understanding of
other’s position, feelings, and frame of reference. |
Avoid all empathy and understanding of other’s
position, feelings, and frame of reference. |
| Communicate a problem-solving orientation. |
Communicate a win-lose orientation. |
| Avoid threats in order to reduce other’s
defensiveness. |
Use threats to get submission. |
| Express hostility to get rid of one’s feelings that
may interfere with future cooperation. |
Hostility is expressed to subdue the other. |
| Communicate flexibility of position to help in creative
problem solving. |
Communicate highest commitment (rigid adherence) to
one’s position to force the other to give in. |
| Behave predictably; though flexible behavior is
appropriate, it is not designed to take other party by surprise. |
Behave unpredictably to use the element of surprise. |
Change position as soon as possible
to help in problem solving. |
Concede and change slowly to force concessions from the
other. |
